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I wanted domestic discipline because I know there's things about myself I want to improve. For me, and for many others, it's about self-improvement. And, like Taken In Hand, it's about the re-connection, and about keeping the relationship in a good shape, not letting silly small things ruin something wonderful.

Well said.

I noticed you said a woman who had been battered and abused by someone, go to her and ask if she'd like DD.

Nooooo! That is not what I meant to say. I know of several women who have been abused in the past who like this kind of relationship, just as I know several people who have been raped who fantasise about rape. The point I was trying to make was not to say that previously-abused women will never like to be beaten, but that it is a mistake to think that the DD woman (or indeed the Taken In Hand woman) is genuinely not consenting. They are. I was trying to show what real non-consent is by giving an example of someone currently (or who has just escaped from her abuser and is still in a battered women's refuge) being abused. Their attitude to being beaten is not at all the same as the attitude of the willing Taken In Hand wife. They HATE it. The Taken In Hand or DD wife might well hate to be WITHOUT it (or at least, without the control on the part of the man that that implies.)

Well, in my early teens I was in a violent and abusive relationship, beaten up and raped many times. I hated it. Absolutely hated it, I just wanted to die, and even now, I'd love to get amnesia or something to forget it. But, it's SO different from DD. So very very different. Domestic discipline feels loving

Yes, this is exactly the point I was trying to make. I shall try to re-word it to make that more clear.

I feel loved because my boyfriend is willing to help me improve myself. Our rules mostly consist of the things that I want to improve, ME.

I think that is wonderful!

by Sarah Cavendish on 2004 Dec 20 - 13:13 | reply to this comment
DD and Childishness
I certanly find the idea of a woman not being able to get herself to bed quite bizarre, but then I've never been a late-night person, I generally find it quite hard to stay awake once I've finished getting the children to bed.

I do find the concept of women being spanked even though they claim to not find it erotic very strange too, I have never had any trouble admitting I find it erotic, and find it quite baffling that anyone would allow themselves to be spanked if it did not arouse them. But, perversely, I find it very much more erotic if I can feel that it is 'real' punishment, it makes it very much more exciting.

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